J's Musings

October is almost gone- time has passed quicker than I can grasp again. I thought I had time; to make my room cozy and read/watch fall media. The idealization of how Octobers look.

But where I am from, that is not how October looks. October for me is, and probably will always be, the time of festivals, celebrations, and lights. Diwali, meeting cousins, going to family functions and of course, vacations.

The slightly dull, lonely vibe of October is tempting and surely aesthetic, but it can never sit in with my very Indian brain.

In opposition to a more western philosophy, we believe in brightening up dull months. Diwali is often known as the festival of lights, and the entire aim of almost every ritual is to spend time with loved ones and spread light.

October and November are ‘sharad ritu’ or departing monsoon. We see as much rain as we do leaves. Which means the earth sheds its old skin and enters a period of rest before transformation comes around. In a time where change is implied as inevitable and reflects itself in nature; festivals help people connect with loved ones and remember that they are not alone. It is a means to create stability and reliability when nothing promises to remain.

It is how October remains for me, family, friends, festivities and the assuring chaos in the background as everything leaves to make space for the new.

I think everyone has a very good view of what “Gilmore girls season” or, “Halloween/spooky season” looks like. It is very aesthetic, romanticized and glazed.

Before we slip into the Mariah Carey phase, let me share with you some very Diwali things that are just as fun and classic.

Before Diwali, there is the preparation; cleaning the house from top to bottom. Everyone in their oldest clothes, covered in dust; being my dad’s helper as he pulls out suitcases and lights from last year.

Soon, the cleaning is over, any dust wiped off with brooms and mops. No more sneezing.

The feel of unsteady rubber in my fingers as my dad expertly wraps it around the balcony railings. The yellow and cream glimmer of fairy lights, colored during Diwali. While we do this, my mother puts in orders for sweets and snacks or faral.

Our homes decked up, we start shopping for ourselves. Sparkly kurtas and accessories to match. Hours at malls, coffee cups in our hands in breaks, bags of clothes; some not even related to the festival.

The firecrackers are bought on the sides of streets; from stalls we can drive to in under 5 minutes to complaint about crackers that won’t burst right. It’s all old shorts and loose t shirts and hands covered in gunpowder. Our eyes thirsting for the explosions that are soon to come.

Then? Then comes Diwali, buying gold on ‘dhanteras’ and finally wearing the outfits from before. The gold is offered to the gods to be blessed and protected before being donned mostly by the women of the house.

Sparklers are lit and waved around inside homes to signify the beginning of a new year. Pretty clothes and faces coated in makeup.

The rest of Diwali is spent dressing up, praying, and then going out to burst crackers with friends or family.

In this chaos of crackers, family, visiting neighbours to exchange snacks and meeting up with everyone you didn’t have time to meet all year around; the dull change of a dying autumn goes unnoticed.

The overlapping of these two radically different vibes and aesthetics often confuses me, but as a teen in a very online world, I am also glad to have access to cultures and practices unlike what is common around me.

I hope I can spread awareness about how my culture is designed around seasons and the dilemmas of teens like me who live a life very different from what they see online.

Love,

Janhavi ❤